So you want to get high but you dislike weed? Maybe it’s the paranoid effects that Marijuana can often produce that daunts you. Or maybe you’re the lazy type who just likes to smoke and chill for the rest of the evening, losing all motivation for doing anything productive with the rest of your day. You might possibly be on a diet and you find when you get high, that pleasant feeling is usually followed by an unpleasant hunger that can only be satisfied with stuffing your face with combinations of food you would never have eaten sober (peanut butter and pickle sandwich anyone). Whatever your reason for searching out an alternative to smoking bud as your method of getting baked enough to where you’re wondering around in an alternate dimension, we have just the safe and effective solutions for you. Time tested, mother approved. OK, the first part of that last sentence is true, as far as mother approval, you might wanna keep these techniques from her, don’t say we didn’t warn you.
- Dank Legal Buds. Yes that’s right there is a one hundred percent fully legal alternative to Marijuana that you can actually order online and have shipped to your house within a few days. Legal buds are just what the name make them to be, potent, herbal, and soothing chronic that gives you a pleasant high that doesn’t make you paranoid, doesn’t give you the munchies, but yet makes food taste better when you eat it while you’re high on them. With legal buds you can actually drive a car and still be under the limits and regulation of the law. The reason we chose them as our number 1 favorite alternative to getting high without smoking weed is because of the ease of getting them, the rich and intense high you achieve from smoking just a small amount, and because of their pleasant odor and taste. Your living room will smell like an Indian campfire deserving for the truly enlightened and conscious altering experimental individual to partake his toke sessions in. We love them, you’ll love them, and your friends will love you for introducing them to our number one method of getting ripped without smoking any MaryJane. What better way of having a get together with some down to earth people than by rolling up the perfect joint and puff puff passing until you eyes get happy!
- Phenibut. Ahh Phenibut, aka the social drug, aka the, I can’t stop smiling since I took some. This stuff is truly amazing and has worked miracles in people’s lives. I first heard about it from a friend of mine who I have known nearly my whole life. This particular friend has always been shy and highly suspected by others of suffering from crippling social anxiety. He rarely uttered a word around strangers and could never get the courage to approach or talk to any girl. It was hard going out in public with him without feeling bad for the guy knowing that he was the only one not having fun in social interactions with others because he didn’t speak and just looked sad and shy. His quietness was a mess. This was completely different from his personality of when we’d hang out just me and him, he would go on and on about different subjects and passion of his, so I knew he was just as capable as everyone else at making conversation but his shyness was holding him back. After graduating high school and going to college, fast forward to two years later when I return home to visit. This friend of mine whole life had flipped a complete 360. He had an amazing job where he had to be social daily, he had a beautiful girl friend, and he had friends texting him all the time to go hang out. He introduced me to more cool people in two weeks than had met during two years at college. I didn’t understand, puzzled I decided to ask him, I actually demanded to know his secret, this was such a big change and in such a short time I had to know how he did it. Phenibut cures social anxiety he told me, it lets me be myself without all the weird thoughts that used to fill my head about people judging me. I asked him, WTF is Phenibut, he told me it’s a fully legal supplement that you can order off of amazon and you can take daily with no side effects. Scientists created it in a lab and have done extensive testing with it on rats and on humans. It has shown to increase social behavior in rats, making them more communicative and friendly toward each other. In humans, it calms anxiety in the mind and thus frees up your brains communication channels to have all the resources that were once allocated to that anxiety, now be channeled through your neuron pathways to the parts of your brain that signal social communication. In effect, it gives you the social benefits and fear and anxiety erasing effects like alcohol does, but it doesn’t have any side effects like drunkess, bad breath, slurred, speech, or any of the other stuff that booze does to you. So you don’t suffer from shyness or social anxiety, can phenibut still be good for you? AbsoFreakingLutly the pleasant warm feeling that starts at the top of your head and drips down into your chest, and into your stomach, leaves you with a nice tingly sensation throughout your whole body. It’s a euphoria of warmness and good feeling all around. You’re basically taking a spoonful of what love would be if it could be a substance. If you’ve never experimented with this stuff, you’re missing out for sure.
Here are the stupid things that are floating around the internet that supposedly get you high. These methods are beyond ridiculously, possibly dangerous to your health, and more than likely made up by middle school kids.
- Sniffing Things. If you like your brain cells, and the ability to smell out of your nose, then don’t huff aerosols, glues, paints, or gasoline. Not only does snorting those chemicals do nothing but numb your brain, they can have long lasting ill effects on your health.
- Nutmeg – Rumor, take a few table spoons of this stuff and you’ll get higher than a kite. Truth, take a few table spoons of this stuff and you’ll likely vomit all over the place and be bed bound for the next few hours with a horrible headache.
- Peanut shells. A certain cook book (which we won’t mention by name) written by anarchists (oops we just did) claimed that if you crush up a bunch of peanut shells and smoke them that you’ll get high and hallucinate. The fact of the matter is if you crush up a bunch of peanuts and smoke them you’ll cough your lungs out and get nothing more than soar lungs and throat.
- Putting toothpaste on a cigarette, freezing it, then smoking it, gives you a buzz. Now, before we mention what is wrong with the logic of that supposed method of getting high, we must say that no we don’t make this stuff up, that’s actually a highly spread rumor floating around the internet. The fact of the matter is if you put toothpaste on a cigarette and smoke it after you popsicle it, the only thing you will have is a hard to light cigarette and some minty fresh breath if you’re able to smoke it like that and you used a good brand of toothpaste.
The moral of the story, stick to our two methods of getting high and you’ll be safe, within the law, and your experience will be amazing.